|Yeb with some stolen VD bounty|
Today was St. Valentine's Day, and while the web was full of "I love Valentine's Day" and "I hate Valentine's Day", the Jeffery Household stayed true to a couple of little traditions. I told the little kids the story of St. Valentine, and all the kids got little treats. The kids all made Valentines for their cousins and sent them up to be delivered. My husband, the man who is far more romantic than I am, brought me roses, a card, and chocolates (most of which I gave to the kids!). I, on the other hand, did nothing for him. I thought we had a pact, one where we just don't spend money on this stuff anymore. The man always, always ignores the pact. It's sweet, and makes me feel like a schmuck. You would think I would be more romantic, wouldn't you? I mean, look at this place! I am a total sap. But I'm not really very romantic - and yes, there is a big difference. To me, being a sap means I wax poetic over everything and am overly emotional. Being romantic - in the Valentine's Day sense - it's just not me. I would rather buy a funny card (but write a long, mushy note) than a lovey one, (but I'd rather get the lovey one), I'd rather give a backrub than buy a gift. Maybe that just makes me cheap? Could be! Honestly, when my Douglas walks through the door with roses, especially on Valentine's Day, all I can think about is how many gallons of gas he could have bought instead. Totally not romantic - and I know he knows I LOVE Valentine's Day, but the roses kill me. They are just going to die. And I know they were expensive, so I can't enjoy them. And that makes me feel mean, as they were given in love, but also I think he thinks he has to buy them. And no amount of telling him otherwise has ever worked. I don't know how to convince him. And feeling this way makes me feel like a big meanie - a scrooge of Valentines. And that was the longest paragraph, ever.
So, as for my Count Down to 40 (can't you just hear Andy Richter saying that, like when he and Conan used to do the "Year 2000" bits?) - anyway, I can't even remember what day I am supposed to be on - I think Day 12? I sort of skipped 10 and 11 over the weekend, with Luke's birthday and other hoopla around here.
As for my goals, in short order:
1. Sugarlessness - well, I ate cake, and a couple of the chocolates Doug got me - but I gave almost all of them away - so better, but not great. *Sigh* - sugar continues to be a battle for me. I always think about sugar when I think of other people's addictions. It is mine, for sure.
2. Movement - well, I found the channel that has the lady doing yoga, and I watched her for a few minutes the other morning. Does that count? No? Shucks. I'll find her, and join her if it's the last thing I do (and it very well may be.)
3.Doing for others - well, I this is hard to say - I really don't like it when people say, "hey, I did this for so and so, or that, or the other" so it would bug me to put down here efforts I do try to make on behalf of others. I really try to do whatever is within my power, and will continue to. I guess you're gonna have to believe me on this one!
4.Reading to my babies - Yes, they are being read to, by Dad during the day, and I read them about a half a million books before bed, but after prayers and teeth, every night since I made it a goal. They LOVE it. Benji loves "The Tale of Benjamin Bunny" because there is a Benjamin who has a cousin, Peter, just like he is a Benjamin who has a cousin, Peter. Luke is loving Winnie the Pooh, and Yeb really, really likes the same Sandra Boynton "Going to Bed Book". He can pick it out and bring it to me every time. So, we have read these three books a gazillion times each. Please note that there are no fewer than 100 books in their bedroom at any given time.
5. Being kinder to my children - I am really working on speaking more kindly to them. I have to say, I am pretty darn sarcastic sometimes, and I have hurt their tender little hearts, especially Kolbe and Luke. They are both real softies, though Kolbe acts as tough as anything you could imagine. And my poor little Luke is just heartbroken any time anyone speaks harshly to him. I am getting better, though I made Luke cry just this evening because I snapped at him for goofing around in his seat at dinner. Poor guy - he forgave me right away, but I still felt badly. My Kenzie, she has picked up my knack for the super sarcastic. She is actually what made me realize the way I talk to the kids, because I was hearing her. And she sounded like me. So now, I have to figure out how to correct some of that. Suggestions on how to get a teenager to quit being so sarcastic are welcome in the comments section below.
So, as I look towards Day 13, and see how really busy this household is, I just want to be more present. I want to actually live my day, not just stumble through it. I do a lot of stumbling through! I want to hold my baby, and just feel the way he feels in my arms and try to cement it in my memory. I want to get to know my bigger kids a bit better. I honestly don't know what goes through Jonah or Jenna's minds. Kenzie and Kolbe are different. They are chatty, they'll tell you EVERYTHING if you are in front of them long enough. You have to draw stuff out of Jonah, and Jenna, I don't know what deviousness is going on in there, but I have a feeling that there is a good bit of devious thought. Hmmm - suggestions for how to get into the head of a 10 year old daughter and the brain of a mustache growing 12 year old son, are welcome.
Have a Beautiful Tuesday, ya'll!