Saturday, May 28, 2011

What would you do? What would Mary do?

"When the time comes, as it surely will, when we face that awesome moment, the final judgment, I've often thought, as Fulton Sheen wrote, that it is a terrible moment of loneliness. You have no advocates, you are there alone standing before God -- and a terror will rip your soul like nothing you can imagine. But I really think that those in the pro-life movement will not be alone. I think there'll be a chorus of voices that have never been heard in this world but are heard beautifully and clearly in the next world -- and they will plead for everyone who has been in this movement. They will say to God, 'Spare him, because he loved us!'"
-- the late pro-life hero, Congressman Henry Hyde

We, as Christians, are called to be counter cultural. I tend to forget this sometimes, surrounded as I am almost entirely by family and friends of the same or very similar beliefs. Most things I watch or read are based in Christianity, or are outright a Christian publication or production. Not everything, of course. I watch the Food Network - and truly you could not find a less controversial network, which is what I LOVE about it. I know I can turn it on and not be confronted with violence, scary commercials for horror movies (I CANNOT HANDLE THOSE COMMERCIALS!) , or any kind of sexual content. I will also watch anything  non-fiction,  Glee, which is my guilty pleasure show, and I have an odd addiction to Friends that has lasted for almost 16 years.  Anyway (sorry, stream of consciousness moment there), as I have mentioned before, I think this tends to leave me truly shocked when I encounter someone who is pro-abort. I honestly am stunned and have to work for a minute or two remember that not everyone shares my beliefs. So, when it does happen, something ticks off in my brain, and it becomes my sworn duty to change their minds, including  if they are misinformed about the Catholic faith or something political. I mean, whether they like flat leaf or Italian parsley isn't going to get my goat, though for the record, Italian parsley is gross - just sayin'.

So, if you have been here this week, you know that I had a run in with someone I talk to on Facebook occasionally. I guess, used to talk to would be more accurate, as I unfriended and unfollowed. It was just too much, and nothing I said was going to change her mind. Her blog got many comments on it, all supporting her, which is pretty typical of the blogging community. It's rare that anyone disagree with a blogger on her actual blog, lest you be labeled a troll, or a hater, even if you have valid points. That's one aspect of blogging - people can turn nasty so, so quickly - the anonymity and knowledge that you are unlikely to ever run into them allows people to be far more hateful than they would dare to be to your face. In any case, I deleted my comments, not because they were wrong, but because I didn't want to be obsessed with countering every argument anyone made. I had already spent a lot of time countering her claims about the church and the church run hospital she went to - (She was mad because she wanted a tubal and they wouldn't do it at the Catholic hospital. To my mind that's a bit like going to a Kosher deli and asking for a ham and swiss on rye - it ain't gonna happen, and why on earth should it?! Private establishments are free to run as they please -and  not go against their dearly held beliefs just because someone demands it).

So anyway, I am sure she thinks I turned chicken and ran. I am trying hard to not go look. I just need to be done - but as i say that - and here's the point of this post - my question to you, dear reader is this...
Is it  my moral obligation to spread the Word in this instance? Am I turning away from something because it's hard, when truly the Holy Spirit wants me to get back in there and fight the good fight? Is HE the reason I can't let it go, or is it just because I am belligerent? Am I possibly ignoring an opportunity to convert this woman? I have been arguing with her for a couple of years now, getting absolutely no where. What should I do? What would you do in my shoes? What would the Blessed Mother do? Somehow I can't see her in a big battle of words, but rather praying for her conversion. Perhaps that's the best thing for now, but I'd love to hear what you think...


  1. Your analogy of the Kosher deli is so true! And I'm going to use your quote, with permission: "the anonymity and knowledge that you are unlikely to ever run into them allows people to be far more hateful than they would dare to be to your face." I found this to be SO TRUE RECENTLY on another person's FB status...I know they would not say these anti-catholic sentiments to my face, but instead pontificate on and on about them on their Fb....they are just waiting for me to respond so they can get into the big "saved" thing...sorry, it's an old argument....
    Perhaps the seriousness of having to unfriend someone is an alert on its own to shake someone up enough to make them think about it all on a deeper plane....I think you did the right thing -- God needs to do the rest...pray and release it to His care...You've defended life...

  2. Use whatever quotes you would like. I know what you mean about the friend posting things - it's almost like they are bating you. This person actually thinks I reported her as spam. I had blocked all her posts long ago, just because I didn't want to spend all my time commenting and feeling harassed.
    I don't know if she'll notice or care that I unfriended - she has a couple thousand friends. I never know how many I have, I know I wouldn't notice unless it was someone I talked to on FB. Anyway, Thanks - I'm glad someone else thinks I needed to let it go. It was going to drive me crazy. I don't seek these arguments out - I don't visit liberal blogs or anything, but once in a while something I see strikes a chord, or something I post strikes a chord with someone else, and then it starts. I have a hard time letting it go! Stubborn I guess.
    Have a lovely Memorial day! God Bless~

  3. Hi, my name's Mary and I found your blog through Catholic Mothers Online. I immediately got caught up in this post when I read it. I've been in this situation, too, and know it's difficult to know what to do. I used to argue my case with people who weren't pro-life but it always felt like hitting up against a stone wall. And you why? Because that is precisely what happens in these situations - we come up against the stone wall of a hardened heart that is not fully opened to the Lord. Now, I pray for the light of the Holy Spirit to soften a person's heart before entering arguments such as this and if I encounter that "stone wall" feeling I back off and just pray for the person's conversion. I also ask Our Lady's help - she a great one to turn to for those with hard hearts.

    Sorry for the long comment :) I loved the quote by Congressman Hyde, also!

  4. Pray for her. Ask for Mary's intercession. That's all you can do. It sounds like you can talk to her until your blue in the face, but she's not ready to hear it.
    Asking for a tubal in a Catholic hospital: to me, that's just looking for a fight; one that she's not going to win.
    Visiting from Catholic Mothers Online! Nice to meet you!

  5. I thought I'd drop in and say "hi" from the Catholic Mothers Online. You have a beautiful family, and a great blog!

    Visit me back at!


  6. Hi Meg - I agree with the other comments - you are not going to change her mind through arguing with her, all you can do is pray for her. Hopefully someday she will get it.


A blogger loves feed back, and a part time narcissist needs it! If you have a comment or question, I promise to get back to you right away, it's not like I have a houseful of kids to feed or anything!