Monday, February 20, 2012


I get frustrated. Perhaps a little too easily. I read a lot of Catholic and Christian blogs, articles, newspapers, etc. One trend I keep seeing over and over and over is that we attack one another. All the time. Constantly. Now, I don't want to come off as 'can't we all just be friends?'...or maybe I do.

For instance, so often I see articles on one topic or another, often abortion or some other topic which is usually a unifiying topic, in the comments section, Catholics and Protestants are fighting over who is right about what aspect of Christianity. How is that going to help us change hearts and minds about abortion, or contraception or any other issue?

Fighting amongst Protestants and Catholics is not new...and it won't stop until there is unity once again. But having differences should not stop us from uniting on issues such as abortion, or the HHS mandate, or gay marriage or any other social or societal topic.

I had never really encountered Catholics engaging in this type of behavior until today. I was reading a thread on Facebook and the topic of NFP (Natural Family Planning) came up. One commenter implied that some people use NFP to postpone pregnancy or avoid it altogether for reasons that were not serious. I have to contend that if a couple is using NFP to avoid pregnancy, then most certainly they are doing it in the right spirit, with serious reason. NFP is hard. It takes dedication, communication and a lot of grace to practice. It is NEVER my business if a couple is employing NFP or not, and in that same vein, it is NEVER up to anyone else to judge if their reason is serious enough. Clearly, they have undertaken to please God. If they had not, they would be using some other, easier form of birth control. NFP implies a willingness to leave things in God's hands. I really don't think that abuse of NFP is possible. I might be wrong, or naive, or whatever, but think about it. Would you go through months and months of charting, temp taking, abstaining, and all that goes with NFP if your intention was to "cheat the system"? If you are going to cheat the system, there are way easier ways. If that is your intention, the sin is the same as if you were using artifical means.

So, how about we give one another the benefit of the doubt? How about we think of one another with charity, rather than assuming abuse. Yeah, maybe that family only has two kids, and maybe they go to Disney every year. Maybe they use NFP...but are trying to concieve and just can't. Maybe the mother is dealing with a health issue where pregnancy would not be recommended, so they use NFP until there is a better time for pregnancy. MAYBE the couple has suffered so many losses, and have decided to use NFP to protect their hearts a bit, and spend the time and money they have relishing the children God has given them. None of these reasons are anyone's business. None of this is for another, save God alone, to judge.

So, how about, as Catholics and Christians, we decide to stick together. Stop judging one another's motives or reasons for the choices they make. Uplift that which is good and holy. Work and pray for justice in all unjust situations.


  1. It is sad that we have to fight amonst ourselves. Imagine all the good we could accomplish if we could all work together. I have been told that I am NOT a christian because I was Catholic.

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  2. Oh you've got that so right. If we could just all agree that there's a whole spectrum of NFP users out there and not judge each other, we could accomplish so much more. Would love it if all of us were on 100% the same page on this, but we're all on such different journeys -- the judging isn't helping any. I'm just glad that there are even secular people practicing NFP, even if they are using it "as contraception" -- it's still better for their bodies and their marriage and who knows, it might even lead them one day to the Church! God has His ways.... Great post!


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