Friday, June 29, 2012

Little Joys...

Today was full of little joys. I got to go shopping with my Kenzie Rosie. We had Starbucks, went to Target, and didn't spend much money. Always good. We went to Sam's Club, mostly on errands, and I watched as sales guys, several of them, made comments to my Kenzie as we walked by. Now, while the mama isn't particularly thrilled with young men making eyes at her daughter, the other part of me knows that these smiles and comments will give her a nice little boost in the self esteem area, and what 15 year old girl couldn't use that? So, I pretend not to notice...and let her have her little  moments without giving them the evil mama eye or anything.

Feeling the heat beating down is a joy of it's own. This summer has been so fantastic, lots of swimming, lots of sunshine. It has been a very summery summer so far, and for that I am grateful. I am not a fan of the snow and cold, but a big lover of long, long days and warm sunshine. Even pregnant, I would take this heat over the cold any day. It has been really fun so far. I think my kids have been swimming more so far this year than they got to the whole summer last year!

We went to a graduation party of a young lady our family has known since she was wee small. Getting to see her accomplishments and hear her plans was a joy. It was also fun just to see so many familiar faces! Getting to talk to other mothers, especially homeschooling mamas, with many children, always lifts my spirits, especially when one of those mamas is having similar experiences in the home, with grown children returning home, etc. and feeling much the way I do about it...it helps me to not feel so mean about it all.

Tomorrow will be filled with laundry and cleaning and maybe something fun for the kids, but Doug will be home, and I am hoping to see his face for more than 30 seconds, and that will be a joy. I miss that guy. We have been running in opposite directions since summer started and that is never easy for us. We are buddies. We kinda like each other, so the whole working opposite schedules a couple days a week, along with swimming, dance, library programs, and the whole summer thing, we never really see each other. I know that hoping for a date night is asking too much, but it would be great! Maybe next week, as we are both taking some much needed vacation time.

Planning pink items and making small purchases for this little baby is such a joy that I want to really remember and savor it. I feel like I have waited a long time for her. The loss of the little twins last fall has made this pregnancy scarier, but all the sweeter. I ask them to pray for their sister all the time, for her health and safe arrival. I talk to them, and knowing that I have these sweet babies waiting for me in heaven is a strange sort of joy. I am still so, so sad about the loss of them, that the mere mention still brings tears. I have nightmares that I can't find them, or this new baby. That they are just lost. But, I know they are not. We ask God to keep them safe for us every night. We know they are waiting. My subconscious has a hard time remembering, that's all.

So, I plan little things to buy or find, and I savor all the sweet thoughts of a wee brand new baby. I watch her move and kick, and find joy in all of it. I know that so far, she is healthy and strong. We are blessed and thrilled.

The coming week will bring a lot of fun and joy, cousins coming to celebrate the 4th of July, some time off with family and friends, and I am still hoping to fit a date night in there somewhere. There are plenty of things to be joyful about, when you just take the time to look around and find them, and not get caught up in every little frustration...

2 comments:

  1. It was nice to sit and chat with you for a while! The kids just generate energy together, don't they?! lol And seriously, I could use some of it!
    I wish my boys could be swimming more but didn't do lessons this year -- wasn't sure it would work out after how it went part way through last time. And Michael is so fickle about the whole swimming thing. I need to get Jamie and Mark over to the the local pool - but Michael will whine the whole time that he can't go in the deep end, but he won't do anything (lessons or practice) about it - that kid!!! ugh!!! lol
    It has been a nice summer though - and I'm with you - prefer it much more than the cold for sure. Was just at Target myself and enjoyed a Starbucks -- and used my new red debit card! woo! So glad I have one now.

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    Replies
    1. It was nice to sit and talk. We would have stayed, but Ben was having "issues" and Kolbe had a headache.
      Something about Ohio this year. For some reason it is especially pretty. The heat, with the breezes, the way the sun shines, it has just been gorgeous, and I have been loving all of that.

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