Sunday, November 6, 2011

Thankful for My Husband

I don't know if I've ever told this story here, but since part of my keeping this little blog is having a record, I am going to go ahead and tell it. Seventeen years ago last month, my husband and I met at the Olive Garden for dinner. It was a blind date. He was waiting for me outside when I arrived late, dropped off by my brother. As we drove up, I could see him standing there, and I guessed it was him, I think by the shirt he told me he would be wearing. Before I got out, I asked my brother if he looked like an ax murderer or anything. His teenage reply was something to the effect of "No, he just looks like a guy". While he was being mildly sarcastic, it made me feel better, so I hopped out, and approached the guy in the plaid shirt, leaning against the wall. I introduced myself,apologizing for being late (my brother and I had to move a bunch of cars just to get one out so he could drive me over) and instead of some polite reply he said to me; "Well, I already let one table go while I was waiting for you. We have to wait for another one." Clearly, I had already made a bad impression. Lateness on a first date, especially a blind date, might make the other person think you are not coming. I probably was just a minute or two shy of him leaving all together, though he has never mentioned. Hmmm, I'll have to ask him.

So, we went into the Olive Garden to have dinner. Me, babbling away nervously, him, barely saying a word. I was starting to think I was talking to much, irritating him, or he just didn't like me. So, we ate, and drank copious amounts of iced tea. When it was time to go, though, he held my chair and then gently guided me towards the door. We were going to go to the mall to kill some time before our movie started. When we got to the mall, Doug mentioned that he needed to use the restroom because all that iced tea had 'swoosh (with an arm motion and everything) gone right through him'. Well, that finally broke the ice - he turned beat red at the admission, and I giggled, and we were finally a bit more comfortable with each other.

We had spoken on the phone, and decided to see the new John Travolta movie, "Pulp Fiction". Neither of us knew anything about it, but it was supposed to be his comeback movie. And how bad could it be, ya know? We both had loved the "Look Who's Talking" movies and all of his previous work. Seemed like a safe choice.

Well, we got in there, and first of all, tons of cursing, scary scenes, sexy scenes. etc. are really embarrassing when you are sitting next to someone you barely know. It's like you are not sure how to react to them. Never mind the fact that I REALLY don't like scary/suspenseful movies, they just make me a nervous wreck. I was just about to crawl under my seat to hide until it was over when the main female character says something like "Don't you just hate all this 'getting to know you' bullsh*t?" Ya know, just what I had been doing all night long. All the "Where do you work?", "Where are you from?","How many brothers and sisters do you have?", of course not delving any deeper, but still a getting to know you session. Talk about awkward. It was just plain weird.

Anyway, Doug drove me home in his truck, telling me not to worry about the smoke coming out of the heater vents because he had just hit a deer in it, and had it fixed, but they hadn't fixed it right. (This would be the first of many, many deer he has hit in our years together.) When he dropped me off, I just looked over at him, babbled out a "It was nice meeting you!" and ran into the house. I didn't even give him a chance to walk me to the door. I can't remember if that was on purpose or not, but the next time I talked to him, he let me know that he felt badly about not walking me to the door. He had been a gentleman all night, and I hadn't allowed him that last courtesy.

We started talking on the phone the next week. We talked for hours and hours...long distance! I still can't figure out how we paid all those long distance charges, but at the time, we didn't care.

During one conversation, Doug was sewing Elizabeth's pants. I don't remember why he mentioned it, but something happened to me when he said it. It became really clear to me what kind of dad he was. After all I had been through with Meg's biological father, this was amazing to me. He was so aware of his child's needs, he knew her pants needed mending.

Doug picked me up for our second date. We went to a haunted house. I was so excited. I had been daydreaming all week of how he would hold my hand as went we through the haunted houses.

Turns out, I don't like haunted houses, which I didn't want to tell him when he asked if I would like to go to one. I wanted to be all polite and go with the flow. So, not only did he hold my hand, the poor guy held my hand, tucked the rest of me behind himself as he dragged me through the place. I just kept my eyes closed and stumbled along. I am a total chicken. Just can't take that stuff!

We went on a hayride after that, and Doug shivered the whole time because he had just worn a little windbreaker. This isn't relevant, except for the fact that we always talk about how cold he was all night that night.

We wanted to go to dinner after that, but it was getting late. One of the only places we could find open was a Country Kitchen. The food was awful, the place was kinda dirty. We got out of there as fast as we could, but weren't ready to go home, so we spent a few minutes trying to think of an appropriate place to go to be alone to talk. We tried a park, but promptly got kicked out. Who knew you couldn't walk through a park after sundown? After that, Doug took me back to my parents'house, but as usual, it was a lit up and there were a billion cars outside, indicating that there would be no quiet corner to talk. So, we walked around the neighborhood until it got too cold. So we tried to say goodbye in the driveway, but we just weren't ready to leave each other yet. Inside someone had music playing so we danced in the driveway, talking and laughing long after the music went off. I think we were out there for three hours. Neither one of us was cold anymore, and I knew. I just knew deep down that this man had been hand chosen for me by God.

We dated for a few months, but we both knew what was coming. We were married a year to the day we met. We've been together through lost babies, sick babies, blended family issues, and everything that a married couple goes through. He's my best friend. I talk to him even when he isn't standing there (which sometimes leads to confusion, because I am convinced I told him something, and he has no clue), he's the only one who knows everything there is to know about me. He has never let me down, and has always been what I need. Plus, He ALWAYS smells good, is tall enough to make me feel small, and has really bad eye sight, so is convinced that I am hot, poor guy. I think God did a pretty good job picking him out for me, and I am thankful. I hope and pray that I have been all those things to him.

1 comment:

A blogger loves feed back, and a part time narcissist needs it! If you have a comment or question, I promise to get back to you right away, it's not like I have a houseful of kids to feed or anything!